…But the Escalator Stopped; Secret Service to Investigate
by C J Waldron
In what was yet another in an endless series of embarrassing moments, Donald Trump spoke to world leaders in an address to the United Nations General Assembly. But spoke is too kind a word. Instead, he insulted, harangued and rambled on in his typical style. He declared the rest of the assembled nations to be a living Hell due to immigration, called climate change a hoax, and claimed that, due to his leadership, America is once again respected on the world stage.
I will give you a moment to allow your head to stop spinning (or to stop laughing).
Because he is unable to help himself, Trump launched into campaign mode, stating imaginary poll numbers, asserting that he stopped “seven unendable wars” and made the US economy the best in the world. He then urged the assembled leaders to follow his example.
Of course, media reaction was in Janus (the two-faced Roman god) mode, with those on the left seeing it as the rantings of a deranged lunatic while those on the right declared it to be an awesome display of a powerful leader putting the rest of the world on notice. Senator Lindsey Graham even went as far as to describe the speech as evidence that Trump should be allowed to serve a third term, despite what the Constitution says.
Despite all the glorification coming out of the MAGA-sphere, his speech was more akin to Soviet Leader Nikita Khruschev’s banging his shoe on the podium than a “Ask not what your country can do for you” oratory of JFK.
In the Beginning
Trump’s arrival at the UN began on an awkward note. Once he stepped onto the escalator, it immediately stopped. A bewildered Trump stood there for several seconds while his #3 wife, Melania, walked on ahead. MAGA world launched into conspiracy theories faster than a, well, escalator. They demanded a thorough investigation and declared the incident was an attempt by his detractors to embarrass the most fit president this world has ever known.
They continued, in Alice in Wonderland style, to shout “Off with their heads!” even after it was discovered that one of Trump’s own staffers tripped the safety that stopped the escalator. White House Press Secretary Karoline Levitt led the charge, demanding the firing of whoever was responsible.
It would certainly be ironic, or some might say poetic justice, that a faulty escalator could become the symbol of Trump’s downfall. After all, it was the image of him riding down the golden escalator that marked his political ascension, so it would only be fitting that an escalator going up would envision his political demise.
Things did NOT get any better.
When it came time for his allotted 15-minute speech, the teleprompter, which he often used as a way to mock his opponents for using, stopped working. Again, there were shouts of “Heads will roll!” from MAGA world, claiming that it, and the faulty escalator, where attempts to embarrass their Dear Leader. Wild conspiracy theories even claimed such incidents were actually a rehearsal for another assassination attempt.
Totally normal stuff, if you’re a fan of The Godfather, that is. Except instead of being trapped in an elevator or between the panes of a revolving door, Trump would have been frozen on an escalator or dumbfounded by a blank screen as the would-be assassin took aim.
Anyone who has given any sort of presentation knows it is up to the presenter to provide the materials. So, the “broken teleprompter” was actually the fault of the White House failing to provide the information to be presented.
Alas, the assembled leaders were disappointed. Rather than stick to his allotted 15-minute window, the “broken teleprompter” allowed Trump the opportunity to ramble on for almost an hour. The hoped for reprieve from his speech became a tortuous test of their endurance as multiple members abandoned their translators.
Like his presidency, Trump’s appearance at the UN was nothing short of a disaster. But it doesn’t matter. Delusional Donnie will spin it as a success.